Haveo · What to say at a networking event when you don't know anyone

What to say when your mind goes blank

Say the true thing: "sorry, I have completely lost my train of thought." It is a normal sentence and the other person almost always supplies the thread. If you want something easier, describe the room — the queue, the coffee, how loud it is.

Name it, do not cover it

Talking on while searching for the point is what reads badly. Stopping and saying so does not.

Nine times out of ten they will say "you were saying about the..." and you are back.

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Describe the room

"That coffee queue has not moved in ten minutes." "It is much busier than last year." "I cannot hear a thing in here."

Shared circumstance is the cheapest conversational fuel there is, and nobody has ever been judged for mentioning it.

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Hand the talking over

"What about you — what brought you here?" You do not have to introduce a new subject. Ask them to expand on the last one.

"How did that go?" and "what made you pick that?" work on almost anything somebody has just said.

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Why it happens

Working memory is the first thing a loud room and adrenaline take. It is not a sign you are bad at this, and it happens to people who look completely comfortable.

It is also why two prepared questions in your pocket are worth more than any amount of confidence.

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Rehearse it before you walk in.

Haveo builds your intro, lets you practice out loud with an AI coach, and keeps your notes one tap away in the room. Free on iPhone and iPad.

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Common questions

What if it keeps happening all night?
That is usually noise and tiredness rather than nerves. Step outside for five minutes — it resets more than pushing through does.
Should I apologize?
Once, in half a sentence. A long apology makes a two-second pause into the subject of the conversation.
Is it worse if I am not a native English speaker?
Searching for a word is a different problem from losing the thread, and the same sentence covers both. "Sorry, I have lost the word" is completely ordinary and people are glad to help.
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